Longtime customer was reminiscing to Beryl about the old days when Guru was in Court Arcade, and said “your mam was great.
I used to come out of the changing room wearing my own clothes which I’d bought from you weeks earlier, and she would say “you look good in that, you should buy it, so I would have to tell her I already had”!!!
Many people around here call their grandmother’s nana so Guru stocks some birthday cards for nana’s. We were talking about this fact and Tony told us that one of his grandmothers was known to him as ‘nana Smith’ and the other one who was a very strange lady as ‘nutty nana’.
Beryl said does that mean we should call you ‘Nutty Smith’? He laughed and said “no with my body the way it is “Nutty Slack”!!!
Lady came into Guru and asked me to read out some names of essential oils to her as she hadn’t got her glasses with her. I obliged and then her husband joined us telling me that his wife couldn’t see much without her specs, and handed her a pair of glasses which she promptly put on.
She peered through them at him and said “argh now I know what you look like, and God you’re ugly”!!!
Beryl mentioned to Tony that to save time she might link her Facebook with her Twitter account.
Tony said “would that make it twitface then?”!!!
Tony told Beryl there was going to be a film on the TV called ‘The Invisible’.
Beryl said “I won’t be seeing that!”
Tony was looking at a card we sell that depicts a dodgy looking red mushroom with yellow spots, and enquired “is a mushroom a fruit, a plant or what?”
Beryl said “it’s a fungi, and that means YOU must be a mushroom ‘cos you’re a fun guy too!”
Warning SMUT ALERT (this is a bit rude):
Beryl’s on a bit of a diet, but it doesn’t stop her being a bit focussed on food however. Consequently she told Tony that when she had gone for coffee in Cafe Neri today, she had “fancied a pretty little tart with nuts”.
Tony replied “Oh, was it a transvestite then?”